Most of the Christian books, sermons and theological material that my father gave me as a boy failed to catch my attention; but, for some reason, I’ve never forgotten Nancy Demoss’ chart contrasting proud/broken people.

I need this more today as a husband, father, pastor and friend than when I was young: 

Proud, Unbroken People	Broken People
1. Focus on the failure of others	1. Are overwhelmed with their own spiritual need (Matthew 5:3, 7:3-5, Luke 18:9-14)
2. Are self righteous; have a critical, fault finding spirit; look at own life/faults with a telescope but others with a microscope	2. Are compassionate; have a forgiving spirit; look for the best in others (Ephesians 4:32, Colossians 3:12)
3. Look down, in a condescending spirit, at others	3. Esteem all others as better than self (Phil. 2:3, Rom. 12:10)
4. Are independent; have desires for everyone else to meet own personal needs	4. Are dependent on God and His grace; recognize others’ needs and seek to meet them (2 Cor. 3:4-6, Phil. 2:4)
5. Always manipulating circumstances to maintain control; must have everyone do it their way	5. Surrenders control by giving freedom for others to do or see things differently (Rom. 12:1-2)
6. Have to prove they are always right	6. Are willing to yield to the possibility that they could be wrong, and thus, yield the need to always prove they are right(Rom. 15:2)
7. Claiming personal rights	7. Yielding personal rights (Eph. 5:21)
8. Display a demanding spirit	8. Have a giving spirit (Rom. 12:13)
9. Self-protective of time, rights, reputation	9. Are self-denying (Luke 9:23)
10. Desire to be served	10. Are motivated to serve others (Matt. 20:26-28, Phil. 2:20-21)
11. Desire to be a success	11. Desire to be faithful to make others a success (John 3:30)
12. Desire for self-advancement	12 Desire to promote others (John 3:3)).
13. Are driven to be recognized and appreciated	Have a sense of unworthiness; are thrilled to be used at all; eager for others to get credit, honors and awards (I Tim. 1:12-16)
14. Cringe when others in the same field are praised, wishing it was them	14. Rejoice when others are lifted up (Rom. 12:15)
15. Think ‘the ministry is privileged to have me!’	15. Think ‘I don’t deserve to serve in this ministry (2 Cor. 4:7)
16. Think of what they can do for God	16. Know they can offer nothing to God, and seek for God to work through them in His power (Phil. 3:8-9, Titus 3:5)
17. Feel confident in how much they know	17. Are humbled by how much they have not learned and wish to learn (Phil. 3:12, Prov. 1:7)
18. Are self conscious	18. Have little concern with how others view them (Gal. 1:10)
19. Keep people at arm’s length	19. Risk getting close to others; are willing to take those risks for the sake of love for others (2 Cor. 6:11-12)
20. Are quick to blame others	20. Accept personal responsibility; can see and acknowledge personal failure (Matthew 7)
21. Are concerned with being ‘respectable’	21. Are concerned with being real (2 Cor. 4:3-5).
22. Are concerned about what others think	22. Know all that matters is God and what He knows (I Cor. 4:3-5)
23. Work hard to maintain image and protect reputation	23. Die to own reputation (Phil. 3:7, Rom. 14:7)
24. Find it difficult to share their spiritual needs with others	24. Are willing to be transparent with others (2 Cor. 1:12)
25. Want to be sure no one finds aout about their sin	Are willing to acknowledge and confess one’s sin; brokenness is the ultimate sign of personal success (Ps. 51:17)
26. Have a hard time saying, ‘I was wrong. Will you forgive me’	Are quick to admit fault and seek forgiveness (I John 1:9, James 5:1)
27. Deal in generalities when confession sin	27. Deal in specifics (Ps. 51:17)
28. Are concerned about the consequences of their sin	28. Are grived over the root of their sin (Ps. 51:5)
29. Wait for other party to come and ask forgiveness in a conflict	29. Take the initiative to be reconciled; gets their first (Matthew 5:23-24)
30. Compare themselves with others and feel deserving of honore	30. Compare themselves with God and feel desparate for mercy (Luke 18:9-14)
31. Are blind to their true heart condition	31. Walk in the light of true knowledge concerning their own hearts (I John 1:6-7).
32. Do not display any spirit of repentance, because they don’t need it	32. Continually display a spirit of repentance, sensing their need for fresh encounters with God and the filling of the Holy Spirit (Eph. 5;18), Gal 5:16)
33. Spent time reading these words and wondering if _____________ was reading it	33. Thanked the Lord for using words on the internet to bring brokenness to their lives.